The other day I decided to extract out of the closet my dusty old VCR and collection of ancient VHS tapes.
They’d been sitting in there for more than five years, ever since we moved from our mountain home back into town.
The tapes represented a cornucopia of old memories – mostly from the late 80s on into the early 2000s – when I first began videoing my family and our Life Experience and ultimately ending early in the New Millennium.
Yeah, about 20 years of memories. First, mostly of our kids who were rapidly growing up in the late 80s and 90s, and then our grandkids from the late 90s on.
I soon found that recording movies (and also taking still photos) was something strongly associated with children: Watching them discover the world with eyes filled with wonder, and us witnessing their ongoing passage into actual adult humans.
Sweet times: Splashing in the pool, riding their Big Wheels and skateboards, opening birthday and Christmas presents, vacation fun – all of that and more.
But when our kids grew up and moved out, there seemed to be far fewer reasons to break out the old video camera. By the early 2000s, nearly everyone was moving to a smartphone with a video camera right there in their hand.
So the constant filming of home movies could have continued. But for me, it just wasn’t the same. First, I only occasionally carry a cell/smartphone. I dunno – I guess I’m too much Old School when it comes to having a phone on my person ALL THE TIME.
And that Magical Time -- when the kids were still at home with us or visiting regularly -- was mostly over.
The other thing was: I discovered that memorializing precious moments on video was just not exciting me anymore. And -- after a while -- there’s just so much Time available to watch these old home movies, let alone view the mountains of photos we've taken over the years.
My wife and I recently started watching some of our old videos and – while there were plenty of smiles and laughs to be had seeing how much everyone has changed – there was also occasionally heartbreaking sadness seeing those who aren’t with us anymore.
Both of our Moms, and – especially – our dear son, Charlie, who passed from this World far too soon.
Viewing the tapes quickly became a rollercoaster of emotion, with laughter followed by tears.
At this point in our lives, I’m not certain how often we’ll want to pop one of those tapes into the VCR and relive those memories -- both happy and sad.
I AM glad we saved those tapes, because I know we’ll likely want to see them with other family members from time to time.
But it won’t be that often.
Because it’s far better to live in the present than try to relive the past.
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