Meet Me in the Unisex Restroom

I just discovered something that kind of blew my mind: A unisex restroom.

On a recent Southern vacation, I was waiting at a trolley station and noticed a sign on a door that had the figures of a woman and a man above the word "Restroom.” A guy in my party had already gone in and came out to say he’d used it.

You know: Used it.

Like what you usually do in a restroom.

Anyway, I was intrigued. Summoning all my courage (and curiosity), I entered the room and saw a line of stalls on my left, each stall behind a closed door.

On my right was a row of sinks, and at one was a 50-ish lady washing her hands. I gave her a nervous smile, and she returned the gesture. I think I remember saying,” Well, this is really different,” and she agreed -- before briskly walking out.

To be honest, I didn’t stick around much longer either, not knowing which of the closed stalls was occupied and which wasn’t.

After my sense of astonishment began to subside, I first thought: Maybe this IS the future. Combined restrooms would save money by building only one facility instead of two.

And hey, so what’s The Big Deal about men and women going into the same restroom?

At the same time?

But later – upon more reflection and trying to imagine it from a female point of view –- I thought: This will NEVER WORK.

Guys are such slobs (not all, but most), and I’ve been in way too many restrooms with guy spray all over the toilet and around it. Often empty toilet paper dispensers -– and just a generally unsettling fecal/urine odor.

What woman wants to enter a unisex stall and confront that? They’d have to be sending in cleaning squads every hour.

And I really don’t know how soundproof and smell proof these stalls are, but I suspect they’re not really.

And what woman wants to use a stall adjoining one with a male grunting and farting as he does his business?

If you were a woman and had a choice of a unisex restroom or one exclusively for women, I wonder which one you would likely select?

See, I knew there were “unisex restrooms” in America, but I always thought that meant it was a one-room restroom used by both men AND women — but only one at a time –- and with a lock on the door.

My take is this multiple-stall unisex restroom idea is aimed at exhibitionists and other risky-behavior types. I mean: Who would want to take a child or Grandma into a restroom like that?

And what about all the ongoing brouhaha about trans people not being allowed to enter another gender's intimate facilities –- like changing rooms, showers and restrooms?

How would a unisex restroom be that much different? (Well, sharing a unisex shower WOULD definitely be different...yeah.)

Be that as it may, I just noticed I’ve been asking a lot of questions. But if we ARE going to move into a Future in which men and women go to the restroom together, we’ll need to find some answers we can all live with.

Otherwise, I may have to go looking for the old-fashioned kind.