Super Pigs on the March!

They’re streaming down from Canada, but they don’t seem that polite.

They’re the so-called “super pigs,” and they’re scaring the bejeezus out of some as they oink and snort their way south.

Farmers and ranchers say these pig monsters are a danger to crops, water supplies and other wildlife as they do their “wild piggies” thing.

The porcine invasion apparently started in Manitoba, where locals have launched the “Squeal of Pigs” campaign to heighten awareness of the ongoing threat.

Those who spot wild pig movements are encouraged to report them to the Squeal of Pigs government program. Officials with the program say the wild, super pigs are vectors of disease that could spread to good pigs being bred and fattened for imminent slaughter.

So why are these invasive little demons called “super pigs," you may ask?

Well, it seems domestic pigs and wild boars were intentionally crossbred to help the domestic animals grow larger and better able to tolerate the cold Canadian winter.

But about 20 years ago, the Canadian pork market experienced a severe demand drop and some farmers let their hybrid pigs run free.

That decision has apparently come back to haunt the Canadian pork industry.

But here’s what I can’t figure out: If these nasty wild super pigs are reproducing at such a rapid rate and starting to spill over the Canadian border, why can’t hunters and trappers simply shoot or trap them and either take them home and eat them or deliver them to a nearby slaughter facility for dressing out?

I suppose there are Canadian food laws — and U.S. food laws — that prevent hunters from simply dumping their wild pig corpses outside slaughter houses.

Let’s face it: People LOVE pork. Bacon, hot dogs, sausage, brats — nearly everyone just adores pork.

I DO, too. But I’ve (mostly) given it up in recent years. Why?

Have you seen the movie “Babe”? (I'm tearing up just thinking about it...)

Pigs are considered to be among the most intelligent and human-responsive in the animal kingdom. Pig hearts and other organs are being implanted in humans, as their bodies are similar to human in their internal makeup.

And how do we repay these smart, basically friendly beasts who are helping to advance medicine and human health?

By slaughtering them by the millions every day to feed our relentless appetite for sweet, sweet pig meat. Yummmmm....

As I contemplate the implications of an invasion of wild, super pigs, I have to see it as just a bit ironic:

“Hey humans! You like pork so much you just can’t live without it?

"Well here we come!”